Strengthening Your Marriage After Infidelity
Finding out your spouse has not been faithful to you in your marriage can be one of the most devastating things to experience. The pit in your stomach that feel nauseous and sick seems to be present all of the time after a while. You wonder what you did wrong and why you weren’t enough in the relationship. You feel hurt, angry, and betrayed. You truly wonder how your relationship could survive after all of this. You wonder how is it that the person you sleep next to every night has become a stranger to you. This is someone you thought you knew better than anyone else in the world but you did not see this coming. When you looked into the eyes of your spouse on your wedding day, you could never imagine this. How do you even begin to get through this?
I need you to know before we go any further that I am a couples therapist that helps couples improve their relationship but I cannot be the one to decide if you should stay together or not. I want you to remember you have a choice in your relationship, and it’s you that gets to decide what’s best for you. I also don’t want you to think that a blog post is what will solve all of the hurt you’ve been through. The goal of this blog post is for you to have a place to start and focus in addition to working with a professional.
How do I improve my relationship after infidelity?
Your relationship is unique, and your healing will be individual. Healing after infidelity will be different for every couple. Rebuilding a marriage and learning to trust again after infidelity is not easy and will mostly require the help of a marriage therapist. These are some areas to start mending your marriage.
Take accountability
The first step that needs to take place is for the person that has been unfaithful to fully take responsibility for their actions. Blaming your partner or other life situations for being unfaithful is not ok and will help repair your marriage. Being honest and open with your spouse about what happened is essential in beginning the repair process.
2. Healthy Communication
All healthy relationships require good communication skills and practicing them consistently. It becomes even more important after there has been an affair. Both partners need to be able to communicate their thoughts and feelings. Both partners need to be validated and given empathy and compassion.
3. Rebuild trust
If you are the one that has been unfaithful to your partner, you need to understand that rebuilding trust is going to be difficult. You may become trustworthy before your partner will actually trust you. Even if you have worked on yourself, figured out why you’ve made your decisions, and grown and changed that still doesn’t mean your partner will trust you. Being consistent, reliable, and dependable will all be things necessary in order to rebuild trust.
4. Work with a couples therapist in Utah
Infidelity can be quite complex and hard to overcome without the help of a professional. Couples therapists trained in emotionally focused couples therapy can help you navigate the difficulties that come along with infidelity. A couples therapist knows how to help you facilitate difficult conversations and work through conversations in an effective way.
5. Quality time
Spending time together can help rebuild the connection that you’ve lost as a result of an affair. Quality time together can help foster emotional intimacy by having positive experiences together. It can also allow creating of new routines and rituals together that may have changed as a result of the infidelity.
6. Use self-care
Along with being patient and working with a professional, it’s important that both partners take care of themselves while they are taking care of each other and rebuilding their relationship. Individual counseling to help each partner work through the painful experiences separately can be powerful. It’s important to continue to engage in hobbies and activities that are rejuvenating to your mentally, emotionally, and physically.
What about with emotional cheating?
Regardless of what kind of infidelity has taken place in a marriage, repairing the relationship will still be necessary, Rebuilding trust, taking accountability, learning to communicate, being patient, and working with a couples therapist will all be critical in strengthening your relationship. Setting boundaries to prevent it from happening is important for couples to be able to do. Both partners need to learn to communicate these boundaries and guidelines in their marriage. You will also gain extra support and guidance by working with a couples therapist.
Online Marriage Counseling in Utah can help you heal after infidelity
You don’t have to figure this all out on your own. Online Marriage Counseling can help. If you want to heal after infidelity, working with a marriage expert can help. You can learn to trust your spouse again and rebuild the trust that has been lost. Couples that are willing to dig deep and work hard will have a more happy and more connected marriage than ever before. As a couples therapist, I help couples to be able to reconnect and mend from the pain and hurt that an affair has caused.
Online Therapy in Utah means I work with couples all over the state including St. George, Salt Lake City, Heber City, Provo, Logan, Cedar City, and more.
Start working with a couples therapist in Utah
You can overcome infidelity together with the help of a couples therapist. You can feel safe and secure in your marriage again and couples counseling can help. This Utah Counseling Practice has a couples therapist specializing in infidelity. To begin therapy follow the steps below:
Meet with a marriage therapist
Begin repairing your marriage
Other mental health services provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy
Marriage counseling isn’t the only mental health service provided by this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy include premarital counseling, LDS marriage counseling, EMDR therapy, therapy for men, anxiety counseling, PTSD treatment, and ADHD treatment. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to see how I can help.
About the Author
Marcus Hunt is an experienced and compassionate marriage and family therapist with a deep passion for helping couples heal after infidelity. Marcus is a strong advocate for the power of therapy in strengthening marriages and families. If you're seeking guidance and support in healing after infidelity and rebuilding your relationship, Marcus Hunt is here to help. With his expertise and compassionate approach, he can assist you on your journey toward healing and creating a healthy and fulfilling marriage. Marcus has a bachelor’s degree in behavioral sciences from Utah Valley University and this is where he decided he wanted to pursue becoming a couples therapist. Marcus has a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy. If you're seeking guidance and support in healing after infidelity and rebuilding your relationship, Marcus Hunt is here to help.