Intimacy in a marriage: Thoughts from a Couples Therapist in Utah
As a marriage therapist, I work with couples struggling with feeling connected and close in their marriage. They don't feel as close as they once were. This can strain even the strongest marriages. Not knowing how to communicate well, and struggles with sexual desire are intimacy challenges that cause couples to feel frustrated, disconnected, and even hopeless. The good news is there are ways to overcome these challenges together as a couple. You can feel connected, understood, and have a level of intimacy with your partner that works for your relationship. Whether you're struggling with physical intimacy, emotional intimacy, or both, you can reconnect with your significant other and build a stronger, more fulfilling relationship.
What is intimacy in a relationship?
Intimacy in a relationship is the emotional, physical, and psychological closeness between a couple. Intimacy is feeling connected to your partner on a deeper level. Being intimate means sharing your thoughts, feelings, fears, and dreams with each other. Intimacy involves trust, vulnerability, and respect for one another. Intimacy is shown in different ways such as through physical touch, eye contact, deep conversations, shared experiences, and showing affection. Intimacy is important in having a healthy relationship. It creates safety, security, and support in the relationship. It allows you to feel seen, understood, and validated, strengthening your relationship and overall mental health. While a sexual relationship s often associated with the word intimacy. it is important to know that intimacy is far more than a sexual relationship.
What is normal intimacy in a marriage?
There is no standard of normal when it comes to intimacy in a marriage. Every couple has its own unique needs when it comes to developing and expressing intimacy. You are unique individuals with different needs. You and your significant other will have different ways of expressing yourself and feeling connected. Normal intimacy involves what you both find satisfying and fulfilling in your relationship.
Regarding having a healthy relationship, intimacy in a marriage involves emotional and physical closeness. It involves trusting your partner and feeling a sense of connection and closeness. Emotional intimacy occurs through sharing thoughts and feelings. It happens in the day-to-day experiences through conversations and sharing thoughts and experiences. Intimacy occurs when you seek to understand your partner's unique experience and have empathy and validation for it. Physical intimacy can include holding hands, hugging, kissing, and sexual activity.
What to do when intimacy in a marriage is gone?
It is one of the worst feelings to look at your spouse and realize that there is an absence of intimacy and you don’t know how you got to that point. It doesn’t mean that it’s always going to be this way. You can take steps together to improve your relationship and feel that closeness you felt before.
Talk about it:
Telling your partner how you feel and what you’ve noticed in the relationship can bring awareness to the lack of intimacy. Use healthy communication skills like using I-statements and remembering to validate your spouse's feelings and experiences.
2. Prioritize Each Other
Now more than ever it’s important to start prioritizing spending time together and investing yourself in the relationship. Creating a date night or a weekend away with one another regularly can make a big difference in getting out of the rut you’re in.
3. Focus on your partner’s love language
We each feel loved and connected to our partners in different ways. It’s important to focus on giving love in the way your partner receives it. When you focus on helping one another feel loved, your relationship will improve in intimacy.
4. Work with a couples therapist in Utah
I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to be able to start working with a relationship professional on your marriage before it starts to decline. There are many benefits to marriage counseling. Working with a couples therapist can help you improve your relationship and learn the skills necessary to feel close again.
Online Marriage counseling in Utah can help you develop more intimacy
Marriage counseling can help you feel connected again. Working with a couples therapist can help you recognize what has gotten in the way of being intimate and close and be able to work through it. Many relationships lose connection and intimacy after a negative experience in the relationship that they’ve never been able to fully process. For other people, having children, working long hours, and other responsibilities have become a barrier to spending time and focusing on the relationship. A couples therapist can help facilitate tough conversations and give you the skills you need to become close again.
Online couples therapy allows me to work with clients all over the state of Utah. I work with couples in St. George, Cedar City, Logan, Salt Lake City, Heber City,
Begin working with a couples therapist in Utah
You don’t have to keep feeling distant and alone from your spouse. You can feel close and connected again. Marriage counseling can help. This Utah Counseling Practice has a couples therapist specializing in treating intimacy in couples. To begin therapy follow the steps below:
Meet with a marriage therapist in Utah
Start working on your relationship
Other mental health services provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy
Marriage counseling isn’t the only counseling service provided by this Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy include EMDR therapy, therapy for men, premarital counseling, anxiety counseling, depression therapy, PTSD treatment, and more. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to see how I can help.
About the Author
Marcus Hunt is a marriage and family therapist at Marcus Hunt Therapy near Provo, Utah. Marcus has a master's degree in marriage and family therapy and loves helping couples through their relationship barriers and intimacy issues. He knows how important it is to feel connected and close to your spouse. Marcus knows that marriage requires attention and effort to remain intimate. Marcus uses emotionally focused couples therapy to help couples learn to communicate and express themselves.